I don't know about you guys but when I was growing up I used to wonder what it was like to be an adult. When I was about 15, my mom helped me with a school project where we had to plan out a budget with a mortgage, bills, groceries etc. I don't remember the specific numbers but what my mom remembers was that I was in tears because based on the realistic budget I had created I was going to have to ride my bike everywhere as I wouldn't be able to afford car payments or gas.
Yes, on that day reality set in and I figured that being an adult mostly meant trying to balance a budget and deal with money woes.
A few years ago, I remember having the revelation that being an adult was all about problem solving. Which really it is, you constantly are solving problems and managing your time. However, I've decided that there's another facet to what adulthood feels like - inadequacy.
Do you ever feel like you're doing a less than adequate job in your life roles? My goodness, there's always something I feel I'm sucking at. If I don't feel like an inadequate friend than I'm an inadequate paramedic, an inadequate sister, an inadequate mommy to my my fur-baby, an inadequate Christian.
On one hand it keeps a girl humble but on the other hand it's quite discouraging. I'm not smart enough, I'm not friendly enough, I'm not home enough, I'm not giving enough, I'm not helping enough, I'm not cleaning enough. I'M JUST NOT ENOUGH.
It's enough to make a person nutty. So this week, when it just felt like I just couldn't keep up, couldn't do everything or know everything, when I couldn't give the love I wanted to give, find the time to meet with someone, keep up with the housework, get the car washed, run those long awaited errands or even get food I just had to stop.
Stop. Breathe. Forgive myself for not being what I expect of myself. Do what I can get done while I can do it. Then thank God, because God makes me enough.
Truly, God knows that I can't do it and know it all. He just asks that I talk to him when I feel like a complete loser. He's the best person to talk to because He doesn't see me that way. Because Jesus died for me God only sees me with love. He is the one who makes me enough.
Thank goodness for that. I may not be enough for another but I'm always enough for God. There's another saying I like to keep in mind too. "God doesn't call the qualified. He qualifies the called." You might think you're not up to the standard needed to get a job done, but rest assured, if God calls you to do something and you allow Him to work in your life, He will empower you to accomplish what he seeks. I have found this to be true.
So yes, being an adult usually revolves around managing money, always revolves around problem solving and sometimes revolves around just trying to be good enough to make it through. As long as it always, always, always revolves around God I think we'll be more than okay.
Now to get going on that massive To-Do list. . .
"I pray that from from His glorious, unlimited resources He will empower you with inner strength through His spirit. Then Christ will make His home in your hearts as you trust in Him. Your roots will grow down into God's love and make you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God's people should, how wide, how long, how high and how deep His love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God. Now all glory to God, who is able, through His mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. "
Ephesians 3:16-20
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